Monday, July 6, 2015

Five Low Down Dirty Outlaw Poems From Flesh Wounds

When Thomas L. Vaultonburg published his third book of poetry, Flesh Wounds, in 2011, it's unlikely anyone cared. It had been twenty years since his first book Concave Buddha thudded upon the scene like a cow's liver dropped on the floor of a butcher shop. The poems, true to the title, were mainly meditations on the corrupting force of easy money, booze, drugs, loose women, and getting paid way too much to drink all night and celebrate with other people. 


If you can’t write a poem
In the bathtub
You may be suffering
From iron deficiency
And I don’t recommend
Eating wrenches and pliers
But you sure could lay off
All the bloodletting
And the leeches aren’t
Helping one damn bit,
For chrissakes kid
Nobody wants to steal
The soap it’s already
Been used.

Outsider Poet Thomas L. Vaultonburg as a Rooster


“I’ve come to save the azaleas,”
She says,
And begins spritzing them
With a 20-20-20 liquid
As per her instructions
I strip her naked and
Penetrate without asking.
She folds her arms across
Her chest and I’m fucking
The dead.
She says we’re going to Hell
And I say as long as
We don’t have to take the bus.


Again, third time
This week.
I unwrap my toy
And discover scars,
And a Mayan tattoo.
She bends over one
Of my strongest lines
And as my right hand
Grips the temple of
Machu Pichu and my
Left a handful of goodwill
Towards men (with forty dollars)
I appreciate how entirely
Much more life I’ve had
Than Kafka, Keats or

Outsider poet Thomas L. Vaultonburg punching a shark during Shark Week

The Souvenirs

I find the takeout menus
And martini graphs
From the restaurants
And bars where I
First met them.
I think of that
First kiss and smile.
I also keep the reminders
From the bus stations
Basement apartments
And motels where I
Last left them
To their doctors, car
Salesmen or
I find these jammed into
A book to mark the page,
Forget the anger,
And smile.

How to Leave

Place 10,000
In Monopoly money
On the counter and
Explain this should
Cover the broken
Windows and back
Rent. Take a good
Hard shit in the
Toilet and leave
Bacon grease on
The stove. Make
Sure to toss a sixer
Of something classy
Like Blatz in the cooler
For the next broken
Down sucker to come
Through here.

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